


Mad Kart: Fire Road

by JBvonHerb



Category: Mad Max Series (Movies), Mario Kart - Fandom, Super Mario Bros.
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Post-Apocalypse, Car Chases, Cars, Crazy, Crossover, Explosions, Fan Character(s), Fast Cars, Fist Fights, Gen, Girls with Guns, Guitars, Guns, Original Character(s)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-07
Updated: 2018-02-11
Packaged: 2018-04-08 02:40:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4287654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JBvonHerb/pseuds/JBvonHerb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Luigi is captured by the remnants of Bowser's army in a post-apocalyptic Mushroom World, Mario and his friends go on a mission to get him back. However, after their rescue, they quickly find themselves fighting for survival against a large koopa army in the unforgiving wasteland.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Mad World

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't played Mario Kart in years, but after watching Mad Max: Fury Road, I couldn't help it. I had to do a crossover with them. We'll see how far this goes!

In the blistering heat of the afternoon sun, a lone, lanky man stands on the crest of a hill, reading a weathered map and trying to block out all the buzzes of hidden bugs that are gradually driving him insane. His body is drenched in sweat, but most of that sweat is being kept inside by his attire, consisting of ratty boots, padded overalls, a light weight, green sweater and sandy brown hooded cloak over all of that. His graying hair had gone wild long ago, much like his mustache, which has evolved into a thick, black beard, also graying. Even his trusty green hat with the green "L" inside the white circle is losing its color. 

Luigi takes a deep breath and blinks sweat out of his eyes, which is not much since his tinted, sand caked and cracked goggles hold them in. That problem does not last long, though, since he pulls his goggles down and wipes the glob of sweat off of his face using the back of his gloved hand.

He looks away from the ratty map and scans the desert that is the Mushroom World. He can see mountains in the distance, past all the dried hills that had once been filled with life. The once dark green, rounded spires are now all brown, the mountains, gray instead of blue, and the few clouds he sees are frowning instead of smiling. He has not even seen anything worth eating for a while. Bugs and dried apples can only do so much, and he would rather not have Yoshi try to eat him again for lack of food. That said, Luigi looks back at his vehicle, disappointed in his scant findings of food and civilization and dreading the disappointment he will receive back home.

“Well, it's another Tuesday,” mutters Luigi to himself as he folds up his map. “Maybe Mario was lucky and found something.”

Sighing, he stuffs his map back in his pocket, not really sure why he brought it out to begin with, and heads towards his precious vehicle. It is a modified racing kart from back in the day when there was life on their planet, and while he has rarely won first place with it, it is still special to him, and he armors it up every chance he can get. But despite his best efforts of keeping it in check and upgrading it so he is actually protected, it is becoming harder for him to maintain it due to lack of resources.

Its green paint and the white racing stripe has faded, revealing patches of rust eating away at the metal, and its plating is suffering from many scars on top of that, ranging from scratches, to bullet holes, and in the case of his door, a complete replacement. Too bad all they could use was a slab of metal with a cut out hole for a window and hinges welded on. The rest of his driver's cabin is just barely big enough to seat him, and the engine he has on the back with four boosters and a slot for mushroom power ups is not faring too well. In fact, he has resorted to using the slot for the power ups as a nifty storage slot for his bed roll since he rarely finds usable mushrooms.

When he is next to his vehicle, Luigi proceeds to take a drink of water from his canteen, but in the middle of enjoying his luke warm drink, he hears rumbling and buzzing in the distance. It takes him a second or two to process the noise, but when he does, he yanks the canteen away from his chapped lips, eyes wide and bright with terror, and he quickly caps his canteen, jumps inside his kart and revs the engine.

The vehicle rumbles and shakes, but does not start. and his heart feels like it will shatter his chest from how fast and hard it is beating. Panicking and swearing under his breath, Luigi stomps on the gas pedal harder and bangs on the steering wheel a couple of times, and on his fourth or fifth stomp, the engine belches out a sick, black puff of exhaust and roars to life. Not wasting any seconds, Luigi shifts the gears to drive, nearly ripping off the aged shifting stick, and speeds forward, leaving a cloud of chewed up dirt and black smoke.

Over the wind rushing into his ears, Luigi can hear whistling and popping, and he looks at his door window and sees sparkling fireworks dotting the cloudless sky in bright colors. The visual is unsettling, and what is more unsettling than the signals is the fact that a kart pop over the crest of the hill he was just on. And then another comes. And another. And another. And within seconds time he has a group of twelve karts chasing him down, all covered in armor plating, equipped with cannons, covered in blades with more on the rims of their fat tires, and many of them having pale koopas hitching rides on the outside.

The koopas holler and scream like tribal hunters celebrating a catch as they wave their crude weapons in their hands, and Luigi looks ahead at the flat land, swearing once again at the bad ending he sees coming. The land is flat. No cover. Only dirt. No fancy turns he can use to outrun them. No ruins to lose them in. Just a barren wasteland with an evil sun glaring down at him.

He looks through his mirror again, knuckles white under his tattered gloves and sweat pouring off in bullets and panic consuming him. The koopas are getting closer to where he can now see the details on them.

Their scales are indeed painted white, but some have used black makeup to make their faces look like skulls or to better define the scars on their faces. The ones that are closest, though, are different from the others. The vehicle they are driving has a large, bubbly car set on top of a pair of treads with four armored dirt bikes attached to its sides and the passengers are not following the crowd in terms of body painting. In fact, they lack body paint entirely.

The bubbly, treaded vehicle has a laughing Bowser skull welded to the front, a Gatling gun and a spotlight on it. The koopa driving it has dark red scales, a black shell and eyes of murder, with his arms covered by crude, metal gauntlets. The dirt bikes have their armored plates colored in either red, black, green or yellow, with eager koopas sitting on them. None of the four are painted white, but all of them are sitting on their respective dirt bikes based on the color of their shells, and they are sporting cheap masks that only cover the top of their heads that match their shells. And all four of them have their personalized weapons clipped to the straps they have around their bodies.

Luigi groans. “Oh, no.”

The four bikes pop off the parent vehicle, and all four drivers yell like hooligans as the bikes take flight. The skinny vehicles bounce and wobble in the dirt when they touch down, kicking up more dirt in the process, and they quickly catch up to Luigi. The one in red reaches into the pouch on his strap, pulls out a bomb-omb, winds it with his teeth while driving with one hand, and chucks it at Luigi with insane accuracy.

The tiny black ball of death sails right through the opening of his window, bounces off of his dashboard and takes a seat in the back. Right next to the kart's engine. All Luigi can do is widen his eyes before the bomb detonates.

The explosion blows the engine out of the back, flinging burning and twisted metal sailing and crashing all around the koopas on bikes and Luigi's world blurs into a hellish mix of colors. The entire back end of Luigi's vehicle is reduced to metal shards, and fire erupts from every opening, blowing off metal plates and the guts of the vehicle as the front end flips into the ground. Hot sand rushes inside the vehicle and into Luigi's mouth, and pipes and tires and broken inner mechanics fall around the wreckage as the destroyed vehicle digs, flips, bounces and skids across the ground. When it finally skids to a stop upside down, Luigi's ears are ringing, his eyes are spinning and unable to focus on anything as everything pulsates from fuzzy to clear. All he can hear is his thumping heart and ragged breathing, and his hands feel like they are attached to wet noodles when he unclips himself.

Luigi falls on his head, barely able to make so much as a grunt, and he pushes the dirt out from the hole that had once been his windshield so he can crawl out. He has no choice but to ignore the throbbing and splintering pain in his body, and after he crawls out of the wreckage on his stomach, he is greeted with the dirt bikes swerving to a stop in front of him and the vehicle on treads pulling to a stop behind them.

Blood trickles down his face and from his lips as he looks at the koopas dismounting their bikes, having to squint his eyes due to the glaring sun. When the one in red is close enough, he snickers and lifts his metal plated boot.

“Have a nice nap!”

And the last thing Luigi sees before his world goes dark is the metal boot coming down on him.

 

oooOOOooo

 

Off in the distance, watching the scene unfold through a dirty spyglass is Toad. The short, chubby mushroom headed assistant of Princess Peach watches helplessly and with a slack jaw as the masked koopas hog tie Luigi's limp body and carry him to the vehicle on treads. It takes a little bit of effort to get him in the back seat, but once they do, the red shelled koopa bangs on the vehicle and hops off. The dark red koopa starts his vehicle, and it rumbles and belches out thick, black exhaust before trudging forward with the colorful ninja wannabes hopping on their dirt bikes and following it. In seconds, the vehicle on treads is speeding across the wasteland and all the vehicles with its raiding party file in behind it, easily keeping up.

Toad lowers his spyglass and watches the distant dust clouds with his own eyes, shaking in his tattered boots. “Oh, no. I gotta warn Mario!”

Toad then hastily folds his spyglass down, puts it away in his vest pocket, then he runs as fast as his stubby legs can carry him to his dune buggy while putting on his goggles and gloves. He hops inside his buggy, pulls the cage door down and locks himself inside, and then he starts his little engine with no problem, makes a sharp u-turn, and speeds off in the opposite direction.


	2. Mad News

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toad tells Mario and the gang about Luigi's kidnapping.

Toad's dune buggy speeds down a broken road, bouncing and taking air from the rubble that litters what was once a prosperous town, but is now nothing but blown out shops, collapsing homes and rotting vehicles. One of the places he zooms past is a mushroom shaped building that has a collapsed roof, which has on its shot up wall a torn poster depicting koopas and toads, side by side, staring off in the distance with determination and armed with fancy rifles and donning gold armor. Underneath, written in bold letters, is: _**Unite Or Fall! Enlist and Fight the Mobian Threat!**_

 

Toad turns the corner that the building is on and passes a bubbly tank with its top burnt out, its barrel bent, and one of its tread mutilated beyond repair. Past the tank is another alley filled with destroyed buildings, either shot up or burnt out, with a massive airship that has been reduced to a deflated, metal balloon covered in gashes and burnt out holes with the nose completely crushed in from its impact in the buildings and road. The craft's colors have long faded and its metal has started to rust, but despite the harsh weather getting to it, the logo of a white “G” inside a blue circle with a red trim and thick black outline remains prominent. Off in the distance, he can still see the remains of Peach's Castle. All one half of a tower and the surrounding pile of rubble of it, made all the easier to see by the flat, scorched earth.

 

Toad swallows and grips his steering wheel tighter as goosebumps pop up en mass all over his arms. Every time he drives through this part he gets them, and he really wishes Mario would pick another place to settle, especially since this area is basically dead. However, Mario is very reluctant to leave and quite understandably so.

 

This town has been his home his whole life, and now Toad's fellow mushroom headed survivors have converged to make a new life for themselves. They have taken shelter in the destroyed buildings, using whatever tarp or scrap metal they can use to make shacks or shops. The lucky ones have managed to claim still standing structures as their homes or shops, but most places have been burned down or have rotted to uselessness.

 

Surprisingly, Mario's house down at the end of the road remains largely intact. Sure there is a giant hole on the second floor corner, which is now being occupied by a sandbag post with someone standing guard with a sniper rifle, but at least it has not been mutilated beyond salvation. Maybe that is why everyone flocked to his iconic home and settled around it.

 

When Toad pulls up to the drive way, Yoshi greets him with a hungry growl and a lick of his lip. Despite the green dinosaur being chained up, Toad still cringes and takes the long away around, purposefully staying as far away from Yoshi as he can without straying too much into Mario dead lawn. Once he reaches the door he knocks as fast as he can.

 

He has to wait a few seconds that feel like minutes to him because Yoshi is still staring at him, growling hungrily and licking his lips, but when the door opens, he wastes no time in running inside.

 

“Thank goodness! I thought Yoshi was going to eat me!” says Toad.

 

“Yeah, I keep telling Mario to put a muzzle on him, but he won't listen,” says Wario as he closes the door while shouldering his shotgun, which has an old flower power up in a transparent chamber. He is wearing his overalls and a yellow shirt underneath modified football and soccer pads, and has an ammo belt slung around his chest, with a combat knife's scabbard attached to his sleeve. “We've been waiting for you and Luigi forever. What took you?”

 

Toad goes into the living room and flops on the rotten couch, pale as chalk and hands wringing each other as he stares at the floor. “About that. We have a problem.”

 

“What's the problem?” asks Wario, now taking a seat across from him with his weapon between his legs.

 

“Well... Luigi was kidnapped by koopas.”

 

Wario blinks blankly, and Toad looks back at him, both completely silent. The only noise is of Peach humming in the kitchen and probably making a cake out of scrap. With Wario's staring, Toad becomes slightly confused as to why Mario's troll of a clone is looking as brain dead as he is. Finally, after an awkward moment of silence, Wario tilts his head quizzically and speaks.

 

“So, what's the problem?” asks Wario.

 

And next thing Toad knows, he is standing in front of Mario's oak desk, looking at the Hero of the Mushroom Kingdom in all of his glory and horror as he stands up with his fists slamming on his desk.

 

“What do you mean my brother was taken by the koopas?” says Mario dangerously. He is wearing a ratty, red suit with a blue tie, and unlike Luigi, he has kept his mustache trimmed, even though he cannot do much for the afternoon shadow on his face. He has also settled for letting his hair grow out into a ponytail, but Toad just does not have the heart to tell him that his new looks makes him out to be a slime ball.

 

“I think he means Luigi was taken by the koopas,” says Wario.

 

Mario shoots a glare at him, and he merely shrugs. Daisy just happens to be there, as well, wearing her motorcycle jumpsuit, which emphasizes her figure, and has strips of metal around her waist and her collar and shoulders, and they are held in place by belts. She also has metal gauntlets and shin pads and a sniper rifle with a feather in the power up slot slung around her shoulder and goggles resting on top of her head.

 

“Do you know who took him?” asks Daisy.

 

“Koopas,” replies Toad.

 

Daisy growls. “Well, no shit, genius, but _who?”_

 

Toad takes a step back, fidgeting and chuckling nervously as the three humans stare at him. “Oh, um, I-I don't really know. I think they call themselves the Ninjakoopa Bros, or the Koopa Brothers, or the Teenage Mutant Koopa Brothers, or the-”

 

“So, those ninja wannabes kidnapped Luigi, eh?” says Mario as he strokes his mustache.

 

“Wannabes? Have you seen them fight?” says Wario.

 

“I have!” blurts Waluigi.

 

The group turns and sees Waluigi entering the room, sweaty, shirtless and completely bald with his overalls converted to jeans that are held up by a chain belt. Despite the sun and forced exercise of the apocalypse, his skin is still pasty and his muscles are still flabby with what looks like roadkill on his chest. The only thing to protect their eyes from Waluigi's reflective skin is the oil streaking all over his body. Needless to say, the group shares the look of utter repulsiveness and shield their eyes from him.

 

“Their form may be off, but they can sure pack a punch,” continues Luigi's clone.

 

“Good God, Waluigi, put on a shirt!” orders Wario.

 

“Never. In this day and age shirts are about as useful as morals.”

 

“Waluigi, it looks like you have a dead cat on your chest. Put on a shirt,” says Daisy.

 

“No. Its my body, I can do what I want with it.”

 

“Yeah, well, its my house, my rules, and I'm telling you to put on a shirt,” says Mario.

 

“But I don't-”

 

Mario takes off his suit jacket and tosses it to Waluigi's face, and his grin flips to a disappointed frown as he pulls it off of his head and covers his pasty body with it.

 

“Fascist,” grumbles Waluigi.

 

“Whatever,” says Mario with a roll of his eyes, and then he turns to Toad and motions him to continue. “Go on, Toad. Explain what else happened.”

 

Toad swallows and fidgets in his spot again. “Well, they blew up his kart and took him away, but there was another koopa there. One I hadn't seen before and he seemed to be the leader since he was driving the biggest vehicle and everybody followed him.”

 

“What did he look like?” asks Mario.

 

“He had dark red scales, very evil eyes and he had gauntlets covering his arms!”

 

Mario shakes his head. “Doesn't sound familiar. He must be one of Bowser's new lieutenants.”

 

“Or it could be Rick,” says Waluigi.

 

“Who the hell is Rick?” asks Wario.

 

“You know Rick?” When Wario remains silent, Waluigi points at him with his palm, getting a little annoyed. “Rick! You know, the guy that has the thing and does the stuff?”

 

“You just literally described everybody on the planet,” says Daisy deadpanned.

 

“No, wait,” says Wario, his finger held up and brows scrunched in concentration as he looks at Waluigi. “Do you mean _that_ guy with _that_ thing?”

 

Waluigi nods. “Yeah, that guy with that thing.”

 

“That's Karl. Rick was the other guy with the other thing.”

 

Waluigi thinks for a moment, then snaps his fingers and points at Wario, nodding. “Oh, yeah, and he died after that thing happened to him.”

 

Wario grins and clicks his tongue. “Exactly.”

 

“What are you two talking about?” says Daisy.

 

“Things,” answers Wario and Waluigi swiftly and in unison.

 

Wario then turns to Mario and says: “Anyway, when me and Waluigi worked for Bowser, Karl was head of Bowser's security and was charged with watching the castle while we did all of that Olympics bullshit. The guy has the personality of a barracuda, the fuse of a fire cracker and the humor of a dead cat. Bad news, pure and simple. So him kidnapping Luigi is badder news.”

 

“But why did he kidnap Luigi? What could he possibly want with him?” asks Daisy.

 

Wario shrugs. “Probably acting on someone's orders. The guy can't think for himself for anything. He's practically a robot.”

 

“Maybe Bowser's place is haunted,” suggests Waluigi.

 

Mario slams his fist on the table, making everyone jump and shrink slightly. “It does not matter why they kidnapped Luigi! All that matters is that they kidnapped him and I need to get him back!”

 

“ _We_ need to get him back,” interjects Daisy. “And we have to hurry. There is no telling what kind of torture Luigi is going through!”

 


	3. Mad Talks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luigi wakes up in the custody of the koopas, and Wendy gets a lecture from Ludwig.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. Life likes to get in the way and spoil my writing time.

Luigi jolts awake with a sharp gasp from a bucket of frigid water being splashed against his bare back. He shivers and his teeth chatter as frosty prickles spread from his shoulder blades down the length of his spine. His breathing becomes ragged and his eyes snap around the dim room as his swirling vision focuses. He sees blobs of figures and a slow spinning industrial fan grinding against its rusty barrier, and dim lights flicker in random increments and intensity. He looks up and sees that his wrists have been bound together and are hanging from the ceiling by a chain, and when he looks down, he is relieved to see his still has his pants. What he is not relieved about, however, is that his bare feet are danging and chained to the floor to where he can barely move. He does not like having no shirt, though. It is not because of the fading scars covering his body for he actually likes those, but he is a bit more self-conscious about his bare skin being exposed to the world.

 

“Sleep well?” asks a grim voice.

 

Luigi looks to the source of the voice, which just happens to be in front of him and tossing an empty bucket away, and when his vision focuses he sees before him a male koopa, older than most if the deep wrinkles around his cold eyes say anything. His dark red scales are covered in fading, pinkish lines and his black shell appears to have healed from trauma of its own. His arms are covered in thick gauntlets that appear to be crafted from scrap metal and spare parts of vehicles, and his shin pads are similarly made with scrap pieces and leather straps. Behind him are a pair of koopas painted white, holding rifles with fire flowers sealed inside clear containers on the bodies of their weapons. Their weapons are also decorated with tally marks, etched runes, bone chains and crude bayonets.

 

“You are lucky we did not kill you, you know that right?” says the dark koopa, regaining Luigi's attention.

 

“Who are you?” says Luigi, his voice cracking due to his parched throat.

 

“That is none of your business. All you need to know is that you were brought here because someone wants you, and I will ensure that you look proper when we present you to her.”

 

“Her?”

 

Without making an attempt to answer the question, the koopa turns and orders the door behind him to open. One of the guards bangs on the door twice and the crank wheel spins from the other side, and it screeches and groans as it is pushed open to reveal the red and black ninja koopas that destroyed Luigi's vehicle. Behind them, a group of four dirty female koopas walk in carrying cleaning supplies and a shaving kit, and behind the girls are the other two ninja warriors that were there when Luigi was captured. Unlike their male counterparts, they are lean, have no shells and are wearing simple dresses that have lost their white colors and thickness to the abuse of dirt and time. However, since the dresses are thin and torn in places, Luigi can see their crudely made underclothes and the bodily curves usually hidden by their shells. This, to say the least, makes him uncomfortable.

 

“Uh... this is strange,” says Luigi as he shifts his legs awkwardly in his suspended position.

 

“Would you prefer female mushroom-heads?” asks the dark koopa sardonically.

 

“Actually, I prefer human girls. More specifically, my girlfriend. Which I'm certain-”

 

Luigi is silenced by a swift punch to the ribs that would collapse him if he had not been suspended in the air by chains, and the punch makes the females shriek and fallback. Luigi does fold his body a little bit, but not as much as he wants, and as he coughs and sputters with drool dribbling past his lips and his side throbbing, the koopa steps in front of him and tilts his head up so he can look at his prisoner in the eyes.

 

“I am fully away of who Daisy is, just as I am fully aware of who you are, Luigi,” says the koopa grimly. “I would love to kill you and Mario for what you two have done to my home and people. I would also love to kill those traitorous troll clones of yours and all of your friends and use your corpses as torches, but I do not because my orders are to not do so. I think it is foolish, but I am not in charge.”

 

The koopa grips one of his gauntlets and gives it a sharp tug that sprouts out a trio of crude retractable claws. The blades reflect off of the light as he holds them up to his face, and Luigi swallows from seeing his reflection and the koopa's glare behind the weapon.

 

“However, if something were to happen to where I have to defend myself, my soldiers or my people from you, your brother or your friends, I promise you I will not hesitate to cut off your legs,” says the dark koopa. The koopa slides his blades back in and motions the female koopas forward, whom have huddled by the wall, terrified. “Clean him up. I do not want to give her a mud ball.”

 

OOOOO

 

Night has fallen over the remnants of Koopaland, and Wendy O. Koopa is standing on her balcony, hands gripping the railing tightly, and her eyes scanning the working koopas below. The ones reduced to the lowest of work are scurrying around without their shells, setting up furniture in a wide open space that is illuminated by a mixture of torchlight and battery powered lights. Patrolling them with either diligence or boredom are the white colored koopa troopas. All are wearing their shells, but some have added to their natural armor by using scrap metal to make pads, and all of them are equipped with a weapon of some kind, with the rifle koopas on higher ground and the ones without staying at ground level.

 

Wendy smiles at the scenery below, loving how the koopas are so willing to do her biding, despite the misfortune of not having the glorious lifestyle of before. She has been fortunate, though. The koopas are not only loyal, but generous. They allow her to eat as much as she wants and give her all of the nicest things they find in the wasteland. Some claim she has gained weight, but she knows the truth.

 

They are just unloyal and ungrateful and want to tarnish her image by making her out to be a walking lard ball of pure malice. Those unloyal ones are quickly taken care of, though. Besides, she knows she is not gaining weight. Her shell is just shrinking.

 

“Milady,” says a posh koopa suddenly.

 

Wendy sneers from the interruption and turns to see a koopa wearing a tuxedo and monocle instead of his shell standing in the doorway.

 

“Your brother wishes to speak with you,” continues the butler.

 

Wendy rolls her eyes and turns away from the door while waving her hand. “Fine. Send him in.”

 

“As you wish.”

 

Not a moment later, a series of steps enter Wendy's room and she turns around once again to see her sibling enter with a group of unpainted, red shell koopas behind him. The koopas are carrying his blue, spiked shell with them on a platform, leaving the siblings short and lean figure to be covered by a salvaged robe with a blue base and a purple belt. Much of the sibling's face has been burned, leaving scarred tissue to replace most of his green scales, and all of his hair is gone and the burnt portion of his face has an eye patch. His hands are behind his back and he walks with a limp, marking each step with a hiss and click, and he has to tilt his head up so his jaded eyes can meet Wendy's.

 

“Ludwig, what brings you here?” says Wendy, her cheerful tone fake and disgusting.

 

“Why did you send Karl to bring Luigi here?” says Ludwig, bringing his hands out from behind his back to massage his wrists.

 

Wendy frowns and folds her arms across her chest as she leans against her balcony. “Don't be stupid. You know why Luigi is here.”

 

Ludwig sighs and approaches Wendy's side by the balcony while his servants obediently carry his shell without a word.

 

“Wendy, you know King Dad will not like this. He has a hatred for the Mario Brothers that only grew after the Fire War,” says Ludwig.

 

Wendy snorts. “And yet he does not want us to kill them.”

 

Ludwig sighs. “I know, and that bugs me immensely. But what bugs me more that you sent a war party to capture one of the banes of our existence for...” With disgust, Ludwig watches the workers down below set up chairs and metal swans, all facing an alter being constructed out of scrap wood and metal. “That.”

 

“What? I'm lonely and nobody here is worthy of my grace or affection,” says Wendy defensively.

 

Ludwig grabs Wendy and forcefully turns her to face him completely, and he speaks urgently and sternly. “But think about this, Wendy. You just kidnapped Luigi, who is Mario's brother, and Mario, who is a mad man, beat all of us half to death every time we kidnapped Peach. Just imagine what he will do to us to get his own flesh and blood back!”

 

Wendy pulls away from Ludwig, frowning disapprovingly. “Are you suggesting that I drop him off in Mario's territory with an apology note?”

 

“That is a great alternative to being beaten to death with our own skulls.”

 

“Well tough!” Wendy turns away from Ludwig to look at the scenery again, grinning maniacally as she rubs her hands together. “Luigi is mine, now, and once he is bound to me I will have a submissive companion that will make an excellent symbol of the koopas superiority.”

 

“And what will you do when Mario comes here to get his brother back? How will our superiority stand when we find ourselves in rubble once more?” counters Ludwig crossly.

 

Wendy's grin twists into an aggravated, toothy snarl, and she turns to her brother, fists clenched and eye twitching. “You have become quite the coward, you know that?”

 

Ludwig shakes his head. “No, I have become a realist. Time and time again we boast of our superiority, and yet every time we cross Mario we end up bloody and beaten. So, what defense do we have that will stop him this time? What makes you confident enough to kidnap the only person he loves more than Peach and withstand retribution?”

 

Wendy silently stares at Ludwig, letting the agitation in her eyes and her twitching hand speak the words her lips cannot. Ludwig, meanwhile, returns his sister's harsh gaze with one of his own, but he keeps his hands clamped behind his back and his eyes focused on Wendy's. The servants keep quiet themselves, but do not refrain from casting nervous looks at each other, and when the long seconds of silence become unbearable, Ludwig takes a deep breath and his harsh gaze melts into a sense of fear and disappointment.

 

“Just as I thought. You've doomed us all for your petty desires,” says Ludwig. He then does a dramatic turn, and strolls towards the exit with his servants following close behind. “You are to release Luigi to Mario immediately. I will not have this bastion of civilization destroyed because of your lust and greed.”

 

With that statement, Wendy's fists clench and her eye twitches as a flaming cyclone of disgust, hatred and sadness swirl around inside, burning everything and wanting to lash out at the first thing it can grab. Which, luckily for Ludwig it is not his head but an old lamp that Wendy has yanked loose and throws at Ludwig's feet.

 

“At least I have desires!” screams Wendy, her eyes shimmering in the light. “What do you have!?

 

Ludwig stops, and without looking at his sister, his shoulders sag with a weighted sigh. “Nothing, anymore. Good night, dear sister.”

 

Ludwig quietly sulks out of the room with his servants after that, leaving Wendy to steam alone in her room.

 


	4. Mad Prep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mario and the gang prepare for war against the koopas to free Luigi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to be honest... I forgot I had this account.

“Getting Luigi back will not be easy,” says Mario as he paces in front of a battered map of the Mushroom World hanging on the wall. “The fastest way to get to the koopas is through Fire Road. There is constant one hundred and twenty degree weather, Roy's soldiers patrol it, the Trainers Gang and the Mobian Remnant control chunks of it, and the land is flat so wind speeds and sand storms can get very intense. I will fully understand if you guys want to stay.”

“Nice exposition,” says Wario from a broken couch, his hands resting on the back of his head and his feet kicked up on a table. “But we're still going. Or, I am anyway.”

Peach leans over from her spot on the couch and gently pushes Wario's feet off, and he rolls his eyes and continues slouching in his spot, only with his arms folded across his chest, this time.

“That's surprising. I thought you didn't like Luigi,” says Mario.

“Oh, I don't. I'm just freaking bored, here,” says Wario.

“I personally love Luigi like a brother,” says Waluigi with a sniffle and tears in his eyes. “It breaks my heart knowing that he is in great peril.”

“You are so full of crap,” says Daisy. “You tried paying Shadow with cat food to kill Luigi during the Olympics.”

“That was one time.”

“There was also that other time when you sprayed him with female fox urine,” says Toad.

“One time.”

“And what about the time you replaced his sugar with cocaine?” says Wario.

Waluigi balks at Wario. “You're supposed to be on my side. Also, one time.”

“I am on your side. I'm just saying that they have a point about you being full of crap.”

“And where is the jacket I gave you?” says Mario.

The group looks at Waluigi and once again they see that he is without clothing to cover his disgusting, pale, sweaty, roadkill chest, and they all gag and turn away.

“Oh, for Pete's sake!” says Daisy.

Waluigi snickers and Mario shakes his head, brows scrunched and the bridge of his nose pinched in his hand.

“What am I going to do with you?” says Mario.

“Love and tolerate the shit out of me,” says Waluigi.

Mario sighs and pinches his brow. “Whatever. Just spread the word. We're getting Luigi back.”

 

 

After a few hours, Mario and his band enters what was once the town center. The statues and fountains have been broken down, and shops have been gutted with the front walls removed to allow space to store their arsenal of karts and other vehicles. Toads in greasy jumpsuits run around, making final touches on the vehicles or passing out weapons and ammo to the drafted. Once the toads are armed, they rush to their vehicles, and Mario's group splits apart to get to their vehicles.

The dozen and a half toad vehicles used by the toads are simple karts with armor plating, boosters and power up cannons. Some have their cannons designed to launch shells, others are loading up Bullet Bills, while some have flame throwers with a stockpile of flower powers. The toads that will be operating them are wearing makeshift armor consisting of metal plates made from street signs, or old rubber, or leather attire, as well as arming themselves with crude, homemade rifles, crossbows, and melee weapons.

Leading the small army of toads is Toad himself, who is shaking from the anxiety as he tightens his gloves and watches his little dune buggy being loaded up with fuel and ammo for his machine gun.

As the toads scramble to get their vehicles loaded up, Wario and Waluigi hurry past them, both armed with bats that have large nails protruding from them, along with their weapons. Wario still has his shotgun, but Waluigi is carrying a crude, fat rifle made of a crutch, pipes, scrap parts and a pole saw, which is connected to a fuel tank on his back via fuel tube.

Their vehicle is Wario's old corvette, but its former gleaming purple paint has faded from weather and abuse. The trunk is now occupied by a clunky engine with six exhaust pipes arching up, the headlights have been replaced with floodlights, its tires are now huge and designed for rugged terrain, its grill has spikes on it, and welded to the hood and sides are jagged blades. Lastly, in the back seat is a large machine gun turret with a power up slot, and on the floor, next to the box of ammo is a stash of flower powers.

“This is going to be the greatest road trip ever!” says Waluigi as he climbs into the back to man the turret.

Wario grins and hops into the driver's seat. “It sure is. Hey, Peach, are you excited!”

Peach walks past them, having changed into a skintight, white jumpsuit with pink bands running down her limbs that squeezes her chest and butt, as well as pink gloves and boots. She has left her jumpsuit partially unzipped at the top so the top of her breasts are exposed, and tight around her waist is a belt with metal medical boxes that have red mushrooms stamped to them. She hops on a pink motorcycle with a pair of skinny turrets mounted on the side. It has been buffed up with fatter tires, a bigger engine, and a slot for a power up as well as a platform loaded with more medical supplies.

Hearing Wario, she smiles and slips on her pink helmet decorated with a star.

“I just hope nobody on our side gets hurt,” says Peach.

As she says this, Mario passes her with Yoshi by his side, wearing his overalls and thick red sweater and used red hat, shaking his head at her statement as he pulls on his gloves. She has never really completely grasped the situation they are in. He is sure it has something to do with denial. After all, their entire world was blasted to Hell by the Mobians with their Chaos Bombs, and Hell spat them back out. The good news is that she went from “Nobody getting hurt” to “Nobody on _our side_ getting hurt”. Progress has been made! It only took six years, four months and two days.

When Mario reaches his vehicle -which is at the front of the convoy- he takes a moment to visually inspect it. It is elevated on four large tires, and a roll cage has been installed to cover the driver's portion of its angled body, and the platform on its back has been expanded and reinforced with slim turret bolted on it. Bumpy weld marks mark the vehicle's body like a poor stitch job, and despite Mario's best efforts, the red paint and its blue racing stripes have faded.

Sniffing, Mario unlatches the door to the roll cage and lets Yoshi take the passenger seat before he climbs inside. Once he locks himself inside his hands rub the steering wheel and his eyes glide along the dashboard, observing the power up slot and the many gauges that are covered by the dirty, cracked glass. He then looks at the various medals he has won over the years of racing welded to his dashboard. From the many gold medallions, to the not as many silver, to the three bronze, they serve as a reminder of the days long past. The future that he can no longer have. And one of the few anchors he has left in life.

Long seconds of staring pass, and he sighs and rubs his nose and peers out his mirror to see Peach sitting on her motorcycle, waiting patiently. Probably scared. But despite her denial and her somewhat clutzy nature, she has never been a coward, and she is not starting today.

As he stares at her, Daisy hurries by, tightening the straps on her gloves and making an uninterrupted walk to the center of the convoy. There is her vehicle, and the largest of them all, not that Mario is complaining since he prefers his smaller vehicle over the beast.

Daisy has named her vehicle Duke Sparkles, but most call it Duke, and it is the reaper of the wasteland. Its front is made from a semi-truck, but has armor wielded to it, including grates over the windows and a cattle guard on its front, and holding up that front alone are six large wheels. The body is an armored monster in itself, taking the back end of what was salvageable from a Mobian armored personnel carrier and replacing its depleted energy cannon with a fat barreled one of their own, capable of launching either Bullet Bills or shells. On its front passenger seat is a machine gun turret, and on the roof flanking the cannon with another facing the back are three more machine gun turrets. Inside, fuel, power up and ammo reserves are stocked, barely leaving any room for the six toads inside.

After Daisy hops inside Duke she looks at Mario and revs her engine. Or her three engines connected to one system. Which each sounds like a growling dragon in itself.

This prompts the dozens of engines of various strength to rev. From whimpy whines to rough growls, and scratchy clangs to vicious roars, every single vehicle is itching to move and do damage.

Mario looks through his mirror at his army. He sees Toad give a thumbs up and a nervous smile, Wario nods, Waluigi gives a two fingered salute, Princess Peach smiles and waves, and he looks at Daisy again, knowing that she is probably the only one in the bunch that is rivaling his desires to get Luigi back. He is perfectly fine with that, and frankly he is glad she is on their side with Duke.

Mario looks ahead, pats Yoshi on the nose and revs his engine to join the song of war. He looks at his gauge, and after a few more presses of his pedal, the needle moves to the red and he zooms forward with a puff of sickly exhaust and dust in his wake. The other twenty one vehicles follow close behind, and toads peek out of their homes or move off of the side of the road as the convoy speeds through town, frames and weapons rattling.

“We're gonna kill some koopas! _Woooo!_ ” hollers Waluigi, raising his spiked bat high above his head as he clutches his turret tight.

Mario sees this from his rear-view mirror, and he smirks and slides a mushroom in a slot on his dashboard when they reach the flatlands. The engine shudders, then lurches forward with jets of fire bursting from the pipes on the back. Behind him, flames burst from the convoy and everyone speeds after Mario, some hollering with Waluigi and some firing into the air with their rifles.

As much as Mario wants them to save their ammo he just quietly lets them have their pre-battle fun. He knows what's ahead will be rough, but he is on a mission that he cannot waste any time on, and when he gets Luigi back he'll make sure no koopa will ever hurt his family again.

He will make sure to end the madness.

Permanently.

 


End file.
